Inner Experience
Who is home?
THE DOORWAY AT THE BOTTOM, THE WINDOW AT THE TOP.
In contemplation of what we are doing in the world, it often makes sense to inquire as to who is asking. When we are home in ourselves, who exactly is that? Who is at home in the seat of ourselves? This may not be as obvious as we think.
At the surface of our experience, there is weather. We usually have responses and behaviors which help us meet the day and the changes of the day, from pleasure to challenge and all the way to affront or fearful regard.
When we find ourselves in those experiences, sometimes we ride the tide of our authentic response, and enjoy the deep satisfactions of being ourselves, fully, in dynamic motion. There are few things as truly exciting as that, in a considered life.
We also may discover that we draw back inward toward our center, and watch, evaluating. We may not give much thought to what that center may be, but we know how to get there. Perhaps we need to find an adaptive response quickly, to some new or unknown moment, and sometimes we know just what to do.
At other times, we are truly shocked or fearful, and find ourselves freezing momentarily, neither inward nor outward, finding it hard to choose a response, and not willing to react, either.
Finally, we may meet the moment with a full blown limbic reaction, where our body takes over, and we find ourself on the move, heading out, advancing directly, defending, attacking, rising above, or collapsing beneath. In this varied spectrum of potentials, most of us have a sense, at least part of the time, of what we may be likely to do, and where in self we need to be, to successfully navigate the moment. What we have then is a sense of self.
